Intro

📍 Welcome to The Corvus Effect, where we take you behind the scenes to explore integrated self leadership and help ambitious family men build lasting legacies for themselves, their tribe, and their community. I'm Scott Raven, and together we'll discover how successful leaders master a delicate balance of career advancement, personal health, financial growth, and meaningful relationships. Get ready to soar.

📍

Meet Sande Golgart: Executive Leader and Transformation Expert

And hello everybody.

Welcome back to another episode of The Corvus Effect. I'm Scott. Today I am honored to be joined by Sande Golgart, a executive leader with nearly three decades of experience who believes that clarity is the ultimate superpower from recognizing limiting patterns to understanding when not to act. Sande shows true transformation.

Begins with awareness. We're gonna be exploring pattern recognition, purposeful interaction, and the journey to being your best self from someone who truly believes happiness precedes success as he does his work as a results architect. So Sande, welcome to the podcast, man.

Thank you so much, Scott. It's a pleasure to be here.

Uh, you know, the honor is all mine and my listening tribe as well.

And you know, a lot to cover.

Understanding Pattern Recognition

You bring so much to our audience, and I wanna start with a couple of words that I said in the open, which is pattern recognition and specifically the pattern recognition edge that when we understand it. As part of our lives and career can really be transformative, and I'd love you to help my audience understand that a little bit better.

Yeah, my pleasure. So pattern recognition is one of those things that we often just skate right by. Like we're so worried about what we want to accomplish, how much money we want to make, what we wanna look like, and we just jump to like what's next? And that's a pattern.

Yes.

So pattern recognition is really when you take time to stop and you take time to breathe, and you look around and you say, everything in my external environment is a product of my patterns. So whether it's my company, whether it's, uh, how I show up as a father, uh, whether it's how I show up, um, just as an individual, everything is a result. Of my own personal patterns. So patterns create predictable outcomes.

So the best thing for the audience to understand is everything you have is the result of your patterns.

And so when you think about, man, I would love to change my life. I would love to fill in the blank. You first. If you do not first, get really clear about what it is that you want, why you want it. And then take the time to recognize what are the patterns that have produced my current situation. You'll never change it.

You'll just end up in the same old cycles saying, well, here we go again. Why do I always end up in this same place?

And it's always amazing to me, you know,

There are some who would call that the definition of insanity.

there are, or some would just call it life. Many people, you know, go through their entire life living through the same cycled patterns and they've never stopped to figure out why life is the way that it is. And so, so, you know, I would argue, um, that the grass is greener.

It's just not that you want to chase the green grass, you wanna say, okay, every one of us could name probably five things we wish in our life were different, probably start with our health, our relationships, and then our wealth.

But what everybody, I'd say 99% of the world does, maybe not the world, certainly the western world, is they prioritize those things. My health, my relationships, and then my wealth. But then we act and our patterns show that I'm gonna chase wealth at the expense of my health and the expense of the, you know, relationships.

So our actions kind of turn that model upside down and then we wonder. Why am I sacrificing my health for this job? Well, gosh, if I didn't have this job, what would I do? And you kind of get into this spiral, uh, and then you just kind of start numbing yourself to the idea, I don't really want to think about it anymore, I just want to go to work. which you think is just such a crazy way for us to go through life when in fact, you know, I'm a firm believer that earth is nothing more than a giant playground in the universe.

Yes.

We got put here to have an amazing time just to breathe in the air, to have great relationships, enjoy the fact that we get to embody these physical bodies and have a great time and be nice to each other and mostly be nice to ourself.

And then, you know, so the, the idea of patterns comes from when you start to manage your energy. And you start to realize that my energy is a big part of creating the external environment. Do I have good energy, positive energy? Is it negative? Do I see the world for all the opportunities that are here? Do I see this amazing playground that I get to play on?

Or do I see a world of chaos, fear, anxiety, crime, people trying to take advantage of me? You know, a world where it's more manipulation than it is inspiration.

So once you start to recognize patterns, you are at a significant advantage over everybody else. And this is a big thing like Tony Robbins and you know, Elon Musk and all these people, they're, they're experts at recognizing patterns.

Probably Warren Buffet might be the, the best, right? Like what are patterns? I'll invest in the things that people do habitually. I'll, And I'll be slow and patient and ultimately end up the top 10 wealthiest people in the world.

And, you know, and, and, and, and you know, sometimes, and we'll get into this later, in terms of purposeful inaction, you talked about Warren Buffett and the inaction of moving from his childhood home as a pattern that has served him well.

The Importance of Self-Relationship

But I wanna get back to the concept of self because got a lot of male listeners, and I've said this before, I've saw this again on on the podcast, we're notorious as professional men in putting our work first, then our family, then ourselves, when in truth it should be reversed.

Self to family to work. Put the relationship with yourself first. 'cause that's gotta be the foundation. And I specifically wanna hone down on the patterns which limit us from having a good relationship with self and how to break free from them. I'd love for you to bring your thoughts to the table on that.

Yeah. You know that I think especially for men, A, we're not very good at paying attention to this kind of stuff. We're not very good at talking about it. And it's really a shame. I hope this is something that we can you know, shine more light on. But one of the first things that I think is really important for everybody to understand is the importance of identity

and dropping it.

So what, you're a man, you're a husband, you're a leader, you're an executive, all that stuff just builds expectations that you think you need to live up to. To please other people or to gain their acceptance or to gain likability.

Yes.

But it's nonsense if it's not aligned with your clarity for who you want to be, how you want to show up.

So if I'm really worried, not worried is a bad word, if I'm really committed to my own health. I'm gonna take care of myself, my physical health, my mental health, and not worry about, well, an executive is supposed to be up at 4:00 AM you know, grinding. Uh, I'm gonna take time for myself. I'm gonna make sure that I'm ready to show up when I show up, and I'm going to be fully present and I'm not gonna worry about all these exterior expectations that have been placed on me, or I think have been placed on me.

'cause reality is they haven't, we just think they have. So when you're able to drop that, you get to be yourself. I think everyone would understand, but maybe not have had the chance to really embody We all are enough.

Yes, we are

We're all here with very unique talent, skills, personality, but somewhere along the way we've, we've either through childhood trauma, previous life, trauma, whatever, we've been conditioned to think that maybe I'm not enough.

Maybe I have to work harder. Maybe I, maybe I'm lacking, maybe I'm not a good public speaker. Maybe I'm not, this, I'm not that. Maybe I have, you know. Tough time focusing whatever it is. Um, and that all just derails us from being our true self. And when you can actually shed all of those things that have you thinking and believing or feeling like you're not enough, drives you to take action.

And that's when you're just starting to be busy for all the wrong reasons,

Absolutely.

right.

And, and, and you know, we coined this phrase on this podcast, the Hamster Wheel of Obligation that. Folks feel like they are trapped on the hamster wheel doing everything that they've been told to do, whether by their parents, by their education, by society, as you said, associated with labels in terms of this is supposed to be this and we're, I, I want to bring this to, is that to your point.

That drives action and sometimes needless action.

The Power of Purposeful Inaction

You have a profound statement on the power of purposeful inaction and why that's such a strategic benefit to people achieving what they want. Let's go further into that.

Man, I mean, we could go really far, uh, which I'll save, but, uh, we'll see if we get there. But just what you said, you know, this, this hamster wheel that we're all on. We're, we're getting up, we're going through the routines, we're showing up the way we think. Others want us to show up, and we're, we're taking part in this manipulation side of the world where we're being manipulated.

We're then trying to manipulate others to get more of what we want or what we think we want. And there's this giant manipulation, Whirlpool game going on. That we think to win, we have to be the best manipulator to get people to work harder, produce more, give us more contracts, and, and you're just participating in this world of manipulation

and we wonder why we have a problem with trust in the modern world. Okay.

you are very clearly attached to certain outcomes that you think you need to live up to the identity that you've created for yourself. So, So, of course when I'm attached to an outcome other than just being my best self, then I, I'm a hard person to trust

because I need something. When I show up and I don't need anything, I may want something, I may say, Hey Scott, I'd really want to be on your podcast.

And you say, great, here's an invite. Okay. But if you said, you know what? I don't really think it's the right time. If I was living in this world of manipulation, I'd be like, okay, well how can I make him want me on his podcast? And I'd start working to manipulate you. But when you're detached, you say, great.

It's not really the right time. Maybe it's never, I've, I've run into a, a, good dead end and I'm gonna keep, you know, flowing in the direction I want my life, uh, to go. So the power of inaction really starts to show up as your awareness. Starts to, starts to really rise and you start to see, I don't need to take part in all this manipulation.

I certainly need to start setting stronger boundaries for those people trying to manipulate me. Whether it's my boss, whether it's my spouse, whether it's friends, who you name it, you start to recognize, man, I'm being manipulated,

Mm-hmm.

so I'm gonna distance myself, put up boundaries, protect myself, my health.

And I'm gonna start to live life more joyfully 'cause I've created the right, uh, and proper boundaries for living my life according to my terms where I can still be a great person, show up for people, but most importantly, show up for myself. That brings you to a place where you you don't, no longer need to do things to um, appease others.

You are just being right. You're just being who you naturally are. Now I'm starting to think about with my intention and my attention, what do I really want from this life? And I can sit back and relax. And if you go deep enough, you can actually start to really relax yourself. People like Wayne Dyer talk about this, um, Michael Singer, where you can really surrender to the idea that somebody has an even bigger plan for me.

I can wait to receive this higher intelligence to help guide me into how to lead my best life, find my purpose, find my unique skills, and wait for that moment of inspiration. Then when inspiration hits, now it's your job to act. Right? So I think another way that this might make more sense to the listeners is great quote.

Um. It talks about if you work on your career,

you may have a fine career.

Work on yourself, where that's where your action is. You'll have an amazing life.

Part of that life is gonna have a career involved,

but most people focus on their career at the expense of their health, the expense of relationships, and then they want.

this other stuff, they're chasing it

to try to find happiness.

that, that was me back in the day. So I, I.

I mean, it's all of us still to a degree, right? Unless we've mastered like the, the great Masters, right? These unbelievable people who need nothing. You know, we're all still somewhat playing a part of this game in the physical world, especially the western world.

And there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, there's nothing wrong with anything. Is just consequences to the way we approach life. So if you start showing up and saying, I'm gonna work on me, I am the priority, my health, my mental health, my relationships, my boundaries, and then I'm gonna go do amazing things, amazing things are going to happen for you in your life, which tilts everything back in your favor.

And then you start to see all these favors of opportunity happening. The world's conspiring for you to be, have this amazing life, and you develop what I would call with the help of Deepak Chopra, the ultimate wealth and abundance of wealth. When you get to do what you want, when you want, with minimal effort

Amen.

now.

Now you're really living.

You know, so, so many good things there, Sande, that align with what we've talked about on this series that we talk about work life integration. That work is one role you play amongst many in one sentiment life, and that it has to be inclusive and that the need to believe that the universe is constantly working for you.

Even if you may not understand it, and part of that is being able to create space for yourself to gain the clarity and alignment of what you are supposed to be able to understand.

Creating Space for Clarity and Alignment

Briefly, I'd love for you to go into a couple of ways that you can create that space for yourself.

Yeah, this is, um, okay. This is great. So when we go back to patterns. So you, it's really important for people to understand that your patterns, they're a result of the way that you feel and the way that you think. So you have to create the, uh, space for you to recognize, what am I thinking? So I get that through meditation. I'm not trying to clear my mind and think of nothing. I'm trying to stop long enough to recognize what am I thinking all day long. And when I first started, you know, four years ago, um, I started because I wanted to get really wealthy by the way, I I I read somewhere that wealthy people meditate.

definition, you are wealthy, I'll put it that way.

So there you go.

There you go. So it's working. Um, but just finding five minutes, 10 minutes, I now do 30 to 45 minutes twice a day just to help me. Recognize my thoughts because the most powerful thing all of us have while we're here on Earth, and you can read about this in the book, sapiens is our story and what do we trust about our story?

And you realize that you as an individual have a story. It's either a healthy promoting story or limiting story, one that's destined for. Failure or one that's destined for amazing things that are going to happen to you. So you, you, really need to get in touch with the story that you're telling yourself about yourself.

And then you'll start to recognize there are people playing roles in your story and you have given them these roles, and you better get clear about, are they, did I cast them properly?

Right. So a lot of people have a spouse and they may have this idea of who their spouse is, the role that they play, and they may find out I miscast them for this role, like whatever your story is.

So now you're trying to manipulate them to be the person you need them to be in your relationship so that you can feel the way you want and build your story. And they may say, look man, I'm, that isn't what I signed up

It's always dangerous when you have a need that has to be filled by somebody else

Yes.

something that is a need that you can fulfill yourself or at least control yourself.

Right. So that gets you to a place we could dive into later. Um, like how to find your actual soulmate, where you really can just be yourself. They can be their self. The only role that you're asking them to sign up for is to be more like their genuine self, and that's it. You just get to appreciate who they are for who they are, exactly the way they are, and say, man, like do your thing.

You don't have to show up different for me. I don't have expectations of you other than just being yourself. So getting back to the patterns, that's number one. What am I thinking? So you have to find the awareness to start listening to the, the voice in your head, and that only comes through for me.

Meditation. Now, meditation can be hiking, could be surfing. It could you just go down to the, the water up in the mountains or just sitting in your bed, whatever. But you have to create space so that you can start thinking about what you're thinking. Then the second piece is, what am I feeling? And especially men.

Uh, with your audience, we are terrible by nature at recognizing the way we actually feel. So I went through, you know, two and a half decades of purposely not feeling because I had this identity that I was the CEOI was the president, I was the senior vice president, I was the dad, I was the husband, I was.

You know, the community guy, I was the leader. I was a former, you know, dunk champion,

and I'm sure your head is yelling at you, suck it up, man

suck it up, suck it up, push it to the side. We got work to do. And you just really start to become this diminished self. And then when something really does happen to

you, you start feeling a bit of shame, like, oh, I don't wanna talk about that. Like. That might make me look bad, might make me look soft, but you, you know, I realize the power in talking about it.

Unmuting yourself and realizing if you wanna identify as something, identify as a human.

Yes,

of us are perfect. We all have human elements. We all screw up all the time. So get it out there, you know, be human.

I agree.

With your intention of being a great, the best human you can be, that's like, you know, very powerful.

So creating and allowing yourself to really feel what you feel. Pay attention to the talk track in your story. Then you can start to rewire it and say, man, I don't like the way I'm thinking. Why am I thinking that? And then you get, can explore it. You can have conversations, you can start dealing with it.

Then you start saying, how am I feeling, man? I don't really like that either. And here's a great exercise for, for your listeners,

Yes.

think about the end of the year or preferably three years into the future, and just write down how do I want to be thinking and feeling, and then acting.

Nice.

you can do that, you'll start to think like, I want to be thinking positively.

I want about thinking of what's possible. I want to be thinking that I'm amazing. I want to be then feeling freedom. I want to feel peace in my life. I want to feel like I'm capable of anything and I want my actions to now, actually reflect that where I'm not sitting around because I'm afraid someone's gonna say no.

Yeah, I wanna go further on those actions because that definition of feeling and vision and identity, the best self that comes along with for like where word, I need these results to happen right in the middle of that.

Building Habits for Transformation

Is the transformation that you have to go through and the actions and the habits that have to come along for the ride to get there.

And I know you have a very, very strong point of view in terms of what is the right way to build these habits and actions for the proper transformation to occur.

Yeah, so as you built that list, I just talked about thinking a year, preferably three years into the future, and you think of, this is what I want. I want to be thinking, I want to be feeling, I want to be acting this way. Then you go to, how do I really, how am I thinking today? What's holding me back? How am I feeling?

Am I feeling fearful? Am I feeling reluctant? Right? Then you just identified the delta, or what I would call the interference, so I just identified the interference. Now I just have to start stripping those things away to allow me to feel the way I should feel. You said it earlier, the universe is promoting and protecting me, so what am I fearful of?

Right.

Now I can start to become okay with that and then start to think. Okay, what would get me one step, just one percentage closer to thinking and feeling the way I want, and just think. And then your intuition will likely trigger something. The word meditation, the word hiking, uh, get out in nature something, and then go, I should do that.

And then just do it without any reluctance, without any expectation for being good at it. It. Play with it. Start to play with life, and you'll find I either like it, I don't like it. If you don't like it, move it to the side. Don't beat yourself up. Maybe it's not for you right now. Maybe it's never gonna be for you, and move on and try the next thing and have fun with that.

Then you'll start to find the little habits that you actually enjoy, whether it's related to the way you eat your diet. Um. Nutrition, um, exercise. Exercise is a big one. Everyone like goes way too big, right? With what they want to get done. Just go take a walk. Do you like walking? Walk around the block. If you like it, walk around it twice.

Just start doing these little things that, but only do the ones you really love, and you'll start stacking 'em on top of each other. Your mind and your body will start saying, man, we like this.

The Concept of Easy Growth

Do more of those, and that's why my consulting company's called Segway Growth. The Segway stands for simple easy growth.

People think change is really hard. It's not. Change is hard. When you're being manipulated to change, you don't want it. You're resisting and you're rejecting it. That's normal. But easy change leading to easy growth. Are doing the things that you like in alignment with what you're clear about.

The Power of Clarity and Alignment

So if I'm clear back to the way we started the call about what I really want, then it's easy to create alignment and I can start thinking and feeling and acting in alignment with where I want to go, and my body and my mind are saying, gimme more.

Give me more. I like the idea of peace. I like the idea of freedom. I like the idea of flexibility. I love this stuff. Give me more of it. And then you'll start to see like, wow, I'm pretty powerful.

Like a guy that I follow is phenomenal.

Embracing Your Inner Magician

Uh, Peter Crone talks about the word abracadabra and the root of abracadabra.

I'm gonna butcher it, but go find Peter Cone and he'll do a better job explaining it. But he talks about the root of that word is something to the effect of I am that which I talk about.

So he says, look, we're all magicians, amazing magicians on earth. The problem is most of what we create as amazing magicians is this idea that we're not enough, that we're a procrastinator, that we can't do this.

We we're no good at this. And you know what?

We're good. We're co. We're constantly comparing and

what we become that we actually, abracadabra, I'm a procrastinator. All of a sudden I can't get anything done. But abracadabra, I'm amazing. Now I start to realize like, shit, I really am amazing. Like I really have a lot of potential. I really have. So that is the most powerful thing that my clients start to recognize is they get to a point where they have this like uh oh shit moment.

They're like, I really can become anything I want now. I have to be really clear about what I want because going to become that.

You know, it's so fascinating because you, there's the whole concept of becoming, becoming the best version of yourself.

Qualities of a Level Five Leader

I'll keep this into the professional realm because I know you talk about this concept level five leadership and in practice. Some of the elements, which I really found fascinating in terms of your point of view on this is there is an element of humility.

You have to bring to the professional will that you bring to the arena. There is the need to develop others as a core leadership function and not just have the spotlight on yourself all the time. So tying this all together in terms of the best self that you can be. If you just had a couple of key qualities to say, if you, if you, if you tuned out for the first 30 minutes of this podcast, listen now, because I'm gonna tell you what are the key qualities of a level five leader? Hit my audience with them.

Okay, I, I could put this into one word. And it is where you see that you will trump everybody you're ever in negotiation with, uh, leading or anything. And it is when you have more clarity than the team that you're leading, when you have more clarity than the person you're negotiating against, when you have more clarity than those others around you, you can set better boundaries.

You can act in accordance with your clarity. You can not so easily be manipulated.

So if you just had one thing and just work on one thing, get clarity about who you are, what you stand for, what are your values, where is the trajectory of your life going to take you?

Not just what you say. 'cause we all say like, oh, I wanna help everybody.

Well, you can't do that if you're not really helping yourself because you can't be available to everybody. So. it's funny, like most people, as they're learning something, they want to go teach it faster than embodying it. And I would say that's one of the inaction principles is learn to fully embody it.

Let it work for you first, then go teach. Like people will start asking you. Right, but we always want to help everybody else, and that is usually because it's a cry out for the help we need ourselves. So yeah, that would be the one word. Now, once you have clarity, then you can be totally humble, because I know where I'm going.

and I also know I'm a human.

Mm-hmm.

I'm a human trying to help other humans.

Mm-hmm.

Trying to help myself so immediately, if I know I'm coming from a place of enough, I am enough. I can also fully embrace the fact that I'm gonna make some mistakes. You know, I might not be perfect all the time, but I'm not gonna strive to be perfect.

'cause I know I'm clear enough that I am human and there's a, uh, some humility here that I'm going to fall down. And I just want to know that I'm in a, in the trajectory of where I'm going, that I'm staying true to that. And then you lower your expectations for those people around you. So I don't need everyone else to be non-human.

I embrace the fact that my team is human. My team's gonna make mistakes. So when they do, I don't snap. I just go, yep, that makes

sense. So it's not good, it's not bad, it just happened. What do we want to do about

it in alignment with where we want the company to go? How do we wanna react? 'cause we can't change it.

The fact is, it happened, it can't happen any other way than the way that it happened. So there's no sense in reacting to it. There's no sense in throwing a fit, getting mad, angry. Let's just breathe, figure out what happened, and is it in alignment with where we want to go or not? If it's not, let's choose to do something different, because what you're not changing, you're choosing.

So if you ignore it, if you shame them, you're basically choosing that you want it to happen again.

So that's what makes a real level five leader is you have so much clarity, you're humble, you realize it's gonna take some luck, some alignment, other people's contribution. It's the person that thinks they are all the answers, that they are somehow bigger, better, and then you can't get the best from, from the collective because you are the one with all the answers.

You are the one. You know, with the go, no go. Everyone's afraid of you, you're gonna start exhibiting, you know, some narcissistic behaviors that diminish and manipulate people, and people hate being manipulated. So that's when you're like, well, why don't you do what I say? and then you start going, man, change is hard.

It's really hard to change my team. If you've ever uttered that, you're leading the wrong way.

I agree. I.

And the best example I have is, you know, I'm a West coast guy, so think California traffic. San Francisco traffic's the, it's horrible. Atlanta traffic's probably not much better,

Atlanta traffic sucks. Uh,

but if I had a route,

get a good rainstorm here, everybody forgets how to drive,

yeah. Gosh.

You know, God forbid a snowstorm

there, shut the whole city down.

We had snow again a number of years back,

Well, and I was there a month ago and it was, uh, shut down. So, but if I told you, you know, Scott, I have a route. Nobody knows about it, but you can get from downtown to your house in 10 minutes. It's a road that, I don't know why nobody knows about it.

Would you take that road?

So long as it was consistent. Sure.

You'd probably try it. And then if you got home in 10 minutes, you'd be like, man, that was amazing. So then we would just have proved, change is not hard. You would say, I love it. I'm gonna take it every time. Now if I said, now Scott, I need you to go up to Alpharetta and back down and over, and like, I need you to take two hours to get home because I need it from you.

I need your productivity. I'd be like, God, dude, this sucks. I hate it. Like I hate when you tell me what to do and blah, blah, blah.

Nobody likes to be micromanaged in this world. Absolutely not. You are right. And, uh, you know, if I am doing something without a knowledge of why I'm doing it, you know. Gonna feel good

No, you're gonna reject it. That's why people think change is hard, but they've only think change is hard 'cause they haven't taken the time to build the awareness to recognize their patterns, identify where they want to go and, and this stuff is not complicated, but you just have to take. 10 minutes to back out from the rut that we're in and just take time to really think.

And then you can start to change the entire trajectory of your company, your life, and then ultimately the results. And before you know it, you're living this life that you love and everything is great. Everything is great, even the bad things that happen to you. If we can, like for one you know, two minutes.

This is one thing I think most people don't understand is they go, this all sounds great, but then they start.

Right.

When you start and you start pulling yourself out of existing patterns, it is not going to be easy.

What's that famous expression? Changes hard at first. Messy in the middle, but beautiful in the end.

Yes. So as you're creating alignment, you may have people on your team that don't belong. You may have lower vibrational people who are trying to hold you back. They're trying to gaslight you. They're trying to, uh, encourage you to stay down at their level because they don't want to lose you. And those, those, things are, are hard.

They might feel like, man, the world life is happening to me and this does, I don't like this. Like, let's go back.

and they wanna remain comfortable.

Exactly.

comfortable while you want to grow.

And here's the trick. So they, they say like in the yoga culture, um, an idiot will do the things he doesn't like in life and he'll be miserable.

Yes.

A wise person will only do the things that he or she loves, but the genius will find a way to do what's necessary joyfully.

So once you realize and you've created this clarity. And then you've stepped back and now you're creating alignment. And as alignment is forming, you may have people who don't like it, they're creating discord. They're like, whoa. And all of a sudden your life is like a little bit more hectic. That's when a lot of people react and they think life is happening to me.

But when your awareness is high enough, you realize life is just happening. I'm the one that's giving it. I'm judging it.

Yes.

So if you can step back from that and you realize, actually this is beautiful because it's creating the alignment, we're gonna need to get to where we need to go. Just breathe. Let it happen.

People with low energy, they're gonna have a bunch of discord. They're gonna try to shame you. They're gonna try and say, you don't know what you're talking about. They're gonna try to trigger you. That's when you don't take the bait. You just relax and you say, Nope, we're just gonna keep going in the trajectory we want to go.

And that can be your personal life. It can be your, uh, business life, it can be with your team. And you just find a way to enjoy that process, do it joyfully, knowing this is just creating more alignment. These things are necessary for us to get to where we want to go. They're not good. They're not bad. They're not crappy, they're not amazing. They're just part of the process, and you realize the world and the universe is just happening, not happening to you. They're not trying to hurt you. It's just their reaction energetically.

The Importance of Relaxation and Allowing

You know, it's a beautiful segue as we close this episode usually, and I'll still reference him. Uh, I always do a, uh, tip of the cap to Randy Posh and his book, the Last Lecture, which is a beautiful, uh, you know, uh, piece of work. And he closes it by saying the last head fake. This story was for my kids, but I'm gonna flip it a little bit with you. Sande, 20 years from now has just walked in to hear you with this podcast episode that you're giving. And Sande, 20 years from Now's going to give you one piece of wisdom help you in the here and now. What's the wisdom that you would like to hear?

That I would like to hear or that I think he would tell me.

Yes. That he, that he, that you think he would tell you? Excuse

Yeah, it's funny, I'm not to get too woo woo about this, but I visited myself 20 years from now

in certain meditations and I could tell you what he tells me. Relax, relax even more like you think you're relaxed. Relax even more and, and this is where this is so important because a lot of us block this, allow amazing things to happen.

I. Quit getting in the way. Just relax, like even more than you think. Just relax even more and let amazing things happen. Like you're not in as much control as you think. Your need to grab the wheel from time to time is totally unnecessary. In fact, you're jerking the car off of its path. Let it flow and relax even more, and you will get there faster. The only shortcut to the results that you want that you can possibly take is courage.

That's the only one. So have the courage to go even deeper. Have the courage to have the conversation you need to have, not the one you want to have. And, and just go deeper and, and find the demons and the shadows that you know are there and just pull 'em out. You're being promoted and protected so nothing can happen to you. Accept that you wanna ignore it, so relax, know it's gonna be okay. Pull up the garbage. Acknowledge the things about yourself that you, you know love, Find the things that you think you don't love and learn how to love those. And this, just relax.

The, you, your true self is going to get so much further, so much faster, and just allow it to happen. That's what he.

It's so funny because conversation and. Uh, statement that they say about, professional basketball defense. You have to make happen offense. You have to let happen and in order to play offense in your life and score where you wanna score, right? I. Relaxing and letting it come to you and not forcing things.

You know, it just, it's so hard for us as ambitious, driven people to say, Hey, I can't put everything in place and act on everything. There are parts that are outta my control. to your point, when you have that state of consciousness, the game just comes so much easier.

So much easier. I mean and it's so hard for people to really understand because we've been trained conditioned. We probably have some childhood trauma where someone told us we weren't this, we weren't that. We started to believe it. And or someone told you, you have to work really hard to be good.

Well, I'm already good. I'm already amazing. So what am I working so hard for? And you start to work more efficiently, more effectively. You start managing your energy and realizing like you can light up a room and you can, you can, inspire people to take action just by being there. You don't have to, you can skip through all the manipulation you would've done before.

And people will want to willingly follow you because you have clarity. They can feel that. They can feel your truth that vibrates higher than anything and they're like, man, this is a guy I really want to follow. This is a guy I would walk through a brick wall for. I feel like he wants the best for me. I don't feel like he's manipulating me to give him what he thinks my best is.

He's allowing me to give him my best, which is even better than what he could imagine. I'm capable of.

I agree.

Final Thoughts and Takeaways

And speaking of amazing, obviously you are amazing, sir, thank you so much for being here on the podcast, and I know that you have a amazing invite for the listening audience to find 30 minutes with you. Is that right?

Yeah, I welcome anyone that would like to just sit down, chat, explore, discuss, bring up things that might be interference with no obligation. I'm not, um, this is not a manipulation, this is an invitation, uh, to just explore and, um, without being tied to any outcome. If the outcome feels right to you, then we could talk later.

But this is just an open invitation. Uh, they can schedule that through my website. I think you have the link.

Um, and it's 30 minutes. You won't be asked a single question about signing up for anything. It's just a great 30 minutes to explore whatever you wanna explore.

I. Implore, anybody who's listening to this, please, please, please take Sande up on this. You will certainly come out better as a result of talking to him. I certainly have from my experiences with him, we'll put that information into the show notes. And Sande, you know, it's been a pleasure. Any final words before we close out this episode?

my final word would just be if there's any part of you in the back of your head that just knows that there's more, you know, you were meant for more schedule the time. If you feel like, ah, this isn't really for me. Listen to that. Move on and go do, you know, do something else like unapologetically.

I concur. Right. Uh, I will put this asterisk though, which is one of the things that I have as a belief is men are not as self-aware as they need to be from time to time. So don't discount the voice in your head which says, I really don't know. if you really don't know. Sande is a good person to talk to.

I will say it like that, but with that right, Sande, absolute pleasure. You were a phenomenal person to have on our podcast. Thank you so much for your time.

Yeah, Scott, thanks for having me. It's a pleasure to be part of the Corvus effect and, um, you know, it's been a, it is been an absolute joy. Thank you.

Absolutely. To my listening audience, thank you guys as well, so much. I know you spend your time and your energy in listening to this. I truly hope that the wisdom in this episode serves you well. As always, subscribe, share with anybody who could listen to this and gain something from it. We love getting your feedback in terms of reviews and helping to improve this as a way to really multiply our impact as leaders without sacrificing those things which are most important to us, such as ourself and our family.

And until next time, this is Scott. Take care and we'll see you next time on the Corvus Effect. Bye.

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Outro

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